A close call leads to good works

Most of us who had a brush with going to prison would choose to run as far away from it as possible and never look back.  When Brenda Spahn faced the prospect of a long jail term, she made a pact with God:  if she could avoid prison, she would spend the rest of her life doing his work.  The book Miss Brenda and the Loveladies tells the story of what happened when Miss Brenda decided to devote her life to helping women newly released from prison.

Before her brush with the wrong side of the law, Brenda Spahn seemed to have it all:  a flourishing business, wonderful children, a new successful husband, several expensive houses, and more clothes than she could ever possibly wear.  Having grown up in poverty, she had made a vow to be successful, and she had succeeded beyond her wildest dreams.  When one of her business associates was arrested and facing jail time, she claimed that Brenda was falsifying returns in her tax preparation business.  The authorities didn't do much investigating (from Brenda's perspective), but just came in and started putting her entire family under a microscope.  She finally agreed to a plea bargain which allowed her to stay out of jail, but which also meant she had lost much of what she'd spent her life building up.

Still, she didn't lose her faith and she determined to keep her bargain with God.  She decided to start visiting jails to see what she had so narrowly escaped.  While initially terrified of the incarcerated women, once she started volunteering at the prison, she quickly realized that most of the women had been abused their entire lives (and that the abuse by authority figures was continuing in prison).  She was dismayed to see people get released, only to return quickly to prison.  After learning that the women were given no support or efforts at rehabilitation when they left prison, she realized she had found her calling: to establish a "whole-way house" (as opposed to the traditional "half-way house") where the women would receive support, training, counseling, and spiritual guidance.

As luck would have it, her real estate executive husband just happened to have a seven-bedroom, six bath house that wasn't selling.  Miss Brenda decided this would be the perfect place to do her work.  She had anticipated that the women sent to live there would be like the ones she was used to working with in work release programs -- non-violent, motivated women who would be receptive to help.  The prison authorities decided, however, that this foolish woman should be taught a lesson quickly, and sent her seven of the toughest cases they could find .  These seven women had been convicted of a variety of crimes and were hostile, angry and suspicious.

Brenda soon learned that most of the women had suffered from such severe abuse and neglect as children that they had no idea how to do the simplest tasks.  Making beds, setting the table and doing laundry were things they had never done before.  She also learned that years of institutionalization had left them fearful and rigid.  During their first outing, to Wal-Mart to buy clothes and toiletries, the women were dazed and intimidated by the wide variety of products available to them.

Brenda soon realized that each woman needed responsibility to be trusted with various tasks. At first the women felt that they were being brought in to be "maids" and work for free, or else that "Miss Brenda" was collecting some sort of government assistance for taking them in and getting rich off them.  Soon, however, they began to respond to being responsible for doing laundry, or cooking, or watching Brenda's young son.  Once someone trusted them, they became more confident and less resentful.

Things were going well until a newspaper article, meant to showcase the good work being done, instead alarmed and inflamed people who lived in the neighborhood.  These people reacted with fear and hostility to the idea of all these criminals and drug addicts living next door to them.  While this caused a minor blip in the work done by Miss Brenda, she soon found that it was instrumental in allowing her to expand her reach to help even more women.

Along the way, Brenda finds that, although the Loveladies (so named because this was Brenda's maiden name) learned a new way of life from her, she and her family also learned many valuable lessons from them as well.  I was really inspired by Brenda's spunk and tenacity.  Even when she was afraid, she never doubted that she had been called to do this work.  She endured the belittlement of authorities, anger from her family, fear from the neighbors and her own doubts to found the "largest faith-based transitional center for women and their children in the country."  Not bad for a woman whose biggest concern not long before was where to go for her next luxury vacation!

For more information about the center, visit their website: The Lovelady Center 

Disclaimer:  I received this book for free from Blogging for Books for this review.

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Do your part for a happier life

Books about happiness and how to achieve it seem to be all the rage lately.  I was interested to read The Happiest Life to see if I could gain any insights that would help me lead a happier life.  The author of the book, Hugh Hewitt, is a nationally syndicated radio host, and in the book he discusses the many famous people he's interviewed over the years.  He gives some insight into what makes for a good interview, even if he and the interviewee don't always see eye to eye.

He lists both seven gifts and seven givers who can impact the lives of those they interact with.  The seven gifts are encouragement, energy, enthusiasm, empathy, good humor, graciousness and gratitude.  Each gift is explained in its own chapter with plenty of examples that Hewitt has witnessed in his own life.  The seven givers are the spouse, the parent, family members, friends, the coworker, teachers and the church.

I wish this book could have been more focused on the message, instead of using every opportunity to bash those with differing political or ideological viewpoints from the author.  There are many snide comments and belittling asides about those he perceives as not having he same viewpoint he does.  There's also so much name-dropping and thanking of those who have helped the author along the way that the book becomes very tedious in places.  I think if you can look at his seven gifts, and realize that they can be "given" freely and without much effort to friends and strangers alike, you don't really need to wade through the self-congratulation that makes up the bulk of the book.

Disclaimer:  I received a copy of The Happiest Life from the BookSneeze program in exchange for this review

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You can't teach innovation

Everybody is always looking to be ahead of "the next big thing."  We've all been amazed at some new hot-selling product and said, "Why didn't I think of that?" In the book Innovation's Dirty Little Secret, author Larry Osborne takes a look at how some innovators are able to successfully come up with new ideas time and time again while others fail to make a mark.

So just what is innovation's dirty little secret?  Well, it's not a spoiler to say that it's this:  that most innovations fail.  There are a number of reasons why most people don't know this, from failure not being newsworthy (unless it's on a spectacular scale) to the general optimism of human nature.  The author uses personal examples gained in his experience as a pastor to show how to anticipate risks as changes are implemented.  His principles are applicable in many different situations.

Many organizations are steeped in protecting their current day-to-day operations rather than attempting to plan or prepare for the future.  In order not to miss any important opportunities, it's vital that the organization identify those people within it who are insightful, courageous and flexible.  These are traits that are natural to the innovator.  The author also suggests that the best way to implement innovations without risking too much is to have an exit strategy in place before beginning.  This will allow the organization to plan for what to do if the change turns out not to be beneficial.  The major way to ignite innovation is by making sure your organization has a clearly written mission statement (which differs from the overall vision of the group). 

The section on how to Sabotage Innovation contains many useful examples of how the best ideas can quickly go wrong.  The book sums up with how to leave your own legacy of innovation with your group.  Some chapters have questions at the end to help reinforce the main points covered.  Overall, I found the book to have good ideas, but the main idea of the book, that innovators are born and it's the organizational leader's job to find that person, to be a bit odd.   He also talks about how "Mark Zuckerman" wouldn't be able to get a job at many companies that hire based on minimum qualifications.  I think he must mean Mark Zuckerberg?  Still, for leaders of large groups there are some sound ideas about how to plan for change and how to prepare for failure.

Disclaimer:  I received a review copy of Innovation's Dirty Little Secret as part of the BookSneeze program

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Letter writing for tuition

I, like many others, am always a sucker for anything that remotely has to do with Jane Austen, so I was excited to see the book Dear Mr. Knightley by Katherine Reay.  I was expecting it to be set in the time of Austen's novels, or to feature some of the characters.  I was therefore a bit surprised to discover that this book is only very slightly connected to Austenmania -- namely, the main character, Samantha Moore, is a fan of Austen's work.  Otherwise, people expecting Austen-like characters and situations are in for a shock!

The novel is set in modern times, and features a young girl who's had a very difficult childhood.  Samantha was in and out of foster homes as a child, and after a period of time on the streets as a runaway, she is taken in at Grace House, a home for abandoned children.  Throughout her upbringing, she's always felt alone and rootless, so she's taken refuge in her favorite books -- especially those by Jane Austen and the Bronte sisters.  She often uses the words of the characters in these books to avoid giving away too much of her self, and as a way of keeping people at a distance.  She eventually graduates from college and moves out of Grace House to work in a corporate job, even though she was offered a scholarship to go to graduate school.  Her inability to form personal bonds and her standoffish personality soon get her fired from her job, and she decides to move back to Grace House and look at the possibility of accepting the scholarship.  She knows this is her last chance, because soon she will be too old to live at Grace House.

She finds that the scholarship is still available, but there are some strings attached.  Rather than allowing her to study what she wants, she must study journalism.  With no other options, she accepts.  Also, she is required to write frequent letters detailing her progress in the program to her benefactor, known only as "Mr. Knightley."  The letters to him form the vast majority of the book. 

During her time back at Grace House, she tutors younger children and also begins running with Kyle, a troubled teenager whose upbringing mirrors her own.  Even though her immediate problems are solved, Sam soon finds that her reluctance to open herself up to the world also shows in her journalism assignments.  Her professor, Dr. Johnson, tries to encourage her, but at the same time lets her know that if she doesn't get away from impersonal, perfunctory writing, she will be kicked out of the program.  In the meantime, she struggles with boyfriend issues, personal safety problems, and plenty of self doubt. 

She eventually moves into an apartment and meets the author Alex Powell, a graduate of the same program she's attending.  She's thrilled to be in the presence of such a famous and attractive author, but finds him a bit hard to read.  They eventually become friends and bond over the friendship with a retired professor and his wife.

While I enjoyed most of the book, I did have problems with parts of it.  How likely is it that someone is going to contact you with an offer of free tuition, a paid apartment, a new wardrobe, a computer for schoolwork, etc. and all they ask in return is the occasional letter?  I'm sure we'd all love to have that  happen to us!  And isn't it odd that not only Sam, but most of the people she encounters, have memorized every English and French novel from the sixteenth through the nineteenth centuries, and can identify any quote from them instantly?  Sam was also very prickly and unpleasant most of the time (not that she didn't have good reason), but no one ever seemed put out or angry with her unreasonable behavior. 

I'm not (unlike everyone in this book) familiar enough with the various plots of Jane Austen's novels to know if this is a modern interpretation of one of the books.  Other than the many quotes and references to characters that we are apparently supposed to know all about, there isn't much of Austen to be found here -- so don't be enticed by the title into thinking this is another Austen knock-off.  The story is pretty bleak and definitely grittily modern. 

Disclaimer:  I received a copy of Dear Mr. Knightley in exchange for this review as part of the BookSneeze program

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Common sense isn't that common anymore

According to the most recent statistics, the average American owes nearly $5000 in credit card debt.   Over three quarters of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck, with nothing saved for emergencies or their future well being.   As the recent government shutdown (over the nation's debt)deomonstrates, Americans from all walks of life have severe problems with money.  While there are many books and programs available that promise to help people get out of debt, the common-sense approach offered by Dave Ramsey has helped millions of people to re-think their relationship to money.  The Total Money Makeover outlines the principles that are mentioned on the national radio program The Dave Ramsey Show. 

Although he has a background in finance and real estate, Dave Ramsey has also had a personal struggle with money.  As a newly married man with two small children, he went bankrupt.  This traumatic event caused him to re-think his approach to debt -- basically, that it was never a good idea to have debt of any kind.  The principles of his program are easy to follow and adaptable to every situation.  The steps to getting out of debt are listed in "the Baby Steps."  Baby Step One is to have an emergency fund of $1000. Baby Step Two is the heart of his system -- the "debt snowball"-- which consists of listing debts smallest to largest (regardless of interest rate), and paying as much as possible toward the smallest debt until it's eliminated.  Once that debt is eliminated, work on the second smallest debt. His view is that it is psychologically uplifting to see debts being eliminated, which will help keep people motivated.  Although getting out of debt might be difficult at first, Dave's philosophy is to spend that tough time "living like no one else" (meaning, not buying the latest gadget, eating out more than at home, or taking expensive vacations on credit) so that later, you can "live like no one else" since you will have abundant extra cash that's not being used for payments or interest on debt.  The steps after paying off debt include paying off the mortgage, saving for retirement and starting a college fund for your kids.  This book comes with helpful worksheets in the back for everything from making a "Monthly Cash Flow Plan" to creating your debt snowball.  There are also many stories of real people throughout the book who have used Dave's plan to get out of debt, even though their original circumstances varied widely.  There are also small boxes of "Dave's Rants" where he gives his (strong!) opinions on the "conventional wisdom" of financial issues.  I can truly say that I'm happy to have found the Dave Ramsey plan, because it inspired me to get out of debt and even pay off my house early.  Everyone can benefit from the principles in this book.  If only we could give Congress a Total Money Makeover!

Disclaimer:  I received a copy of The Total Money Makeover: Classic Edition as part of the BookSneeze program in exchange for this review.

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How to get your message across

As someone who occasionally has to make presentations, I am always looking for ways to be a more effective communicator.  In the new book Secrets of Dynamic Communication by Ken Davis, the founder of Dynamic Communications International, a blueprint of speech preparation is presented that is designed to not only take away the anxiety of giving a speech, but to also help the presenter become much more effective in presenting his or her message.

Many people dread presentations, and the author points out the familiar statistic that public speaking is second only to death in the greatest fears that people confront.  I liked Mr. Davis' "get over yourself!" advice that the speech isn't about you (the speaker).  The anxiety most speakers face is due to the overwhelming desire to get the audience to like them.  This is where the problem arises:  the point of any presentation isn't to make the audience like you, but rather to impart some information that's going to help or persuade the audience members.  If only we could remember that once piece of advice, I think it would take a lot of the pressure off!

Then Mr. Davis gives concrete suggestions for how to construct your presentation. His main advice: have only one objective for your speech.  Many speakers try to cram in too much into one presentation, include too much irrelevant information, and don't have a clear focus.  The result is that, in one example he cites, 70% of people polled after leaving a presentation had no idea what the speaker had been trying to communicate.

Using the SCORRE method to construct a speech will ensure that your ideas are all geared toward communicating your one objective.  SCORRE stands for Subject, Central Theme, Objective, Rationale, Resources, Evaluation.  I really liked that a section of the book was devoted to each of these areas, and concrete examples were given.  There was also good advice on how to involve the audience, the use of body language, and how to incorporate humor into your presentation.  I think any potential speaker would benefit from the lessons and advice in this book, both in terms of preparing a presentation, and getting over some of the nerves that accompany public speaking.

Disclaimer:  I received a copy of Secrets of Dynamic Communication from the BookSneeze program in exchange for this review.

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