Sunday, July 13, 2014

How not to suck as a husband

Doug Fields admits right up front that his book 7 Ways to Be Her Hero was originally going to be titled "How to Get All the Sex You Want" but that he thought that title might be somewhat off-putting to the women who were the likely buyers of his book (for their husbands, of course!).  The book begins with reminders to husbands to stop chasing things (success, women, excitement, etc.) and turn their energies into becoming the best husbands they can be.  He uses Biblical principles and ideas to emphasize the point that once married, husbands and wives form one heart and should try to treat each other with more respect and thoughtfulness, since what harms one harms the other as well.

The seven ways are each given their own chapters, with information and examples to explain each idea.  Among the ideas that are explored are "Don't say everything you think" and "Put your pride aside."  I really liked the way the author presented his ideas with reasons to back them up.  For instance, he gives examples of situations in which the first temptation might be to say something which will be hurtful, or cause tensions to rise and how things like this might be better handled.  Of course, it's easy to sit and read (and plan to act on) advice like this when not in the heat of the moment!  Still, I think the ideas about being more thoughtful in our interactions is good advice.

Many of the chapters have a "B" section following. These sections deal with what to do when you (as the husband) feel that you are not the one with the problem that was discussed in the previous chapter.  Sometimes, while not in the wrong, the way of dealing with character flaws in your spouse in such a way that won't exacerbate the situation.  I enjoyed the way the book attempted to give men concrete ways to be more "heroic" to their wives, but also gave reasons as to why these actions will also be helpful to the men themselves in the long run.

Disclaimer:  I received a copy of 7 Ways to Be Her Hero from BookLook Bloggers in exchange for this review

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